Sharing a part of Life
by Barb Long

A true story of care, loss, and love

I was raised by the most loving, faithful parents a child could have. My parents sacrificed so much for me as I was growing up. Five years ago I was given the privilege to return a small portion of that love and sacrifice to my mother.

My mother was diagnosed with cancer of the bile duct in September of 1993. After surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation treatments she was deemed cancer free in May of 1994. Within a month of that diagnosis, she was again not feeling well and was experiencing a great deal of pain. Subsequent testing revealed the cancer had returned with a vengeance, having invaded her liver and stomach. She was hospitalized frequently in an attempt to nourish her and relieve the pain she was experiencing. As summer turned to early fall, her decline was rapidly progressing. It was very difficult to see someone so dearly loved suffer so greatly.

At that time, I was very indecisive on the issue of Jack Kevorkian and the “right to die” issue. Part of me said it was horrendously wrong, while another part of me said that maybe allowing suffering was horrendously wrong. Again, my mother, who had always lived selflessly, was the one who showed me the way.

September turned to October, with my mother being hospitalized once again. The family was requested to meet with the doctor at the hospital for a conference. It was there that the doctor told us what we already knew in our hearts - that the end was near for mom.

I went to her room to spend some time with her. It was there that she assured me that God would never allow her to experience more suffering than she could bear, that her eternity was secure with Him, and that she was ready to die when God was ready to take her. She requested two things. First, that I would ask God to take her home that night. Second, if that did not happen, that she could come home to die. The second request was granted, and she came home to the place she and my father built together, the home where I was taught through loving example that our Heavenly Father is faithful.

We were given the privilege of caring for mom at home. There was morphine in the house for pain management, and an “accidental” overdose would never have been questioned. But there was no longer any question in my mind regarding the “right to die” issue.

God and God alone has the authority to determine when a person’s life here on earth is completed. No human being has that right.

Five days after she came home to die, mom went home to Heaven. I would not trade those days for anything in this world. My children witnessed first hand the bond of love that our family has for each other.

As a result of this experience, my daughter, who considered Grandma to be her best friend, found a best friend in Jesus Christ. My faith also grew immensely. The end of this story is already known - someday we will all be together again at home in Heaven. What would the end of the story be if we had decided to play God, if we decided we knew better than God?

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